Why do people snap, what makes people do strange things, what drives people to commit horrendous crimes? Most times people are shocked by the behaviours of such individuals. But what if that individual was you?

In a conversation with my aunt, I vividly remember her saying, “the devil has got you”. My reaction was to curse at her and not speak to her for years. Has the devil gotten a hold of me or was that who I was? As far as I was concerned, I was normal, a good person, but, was I in denial?

When did I lose my way? When did I become a lying, conniving, promiscuous, cheating female? They say hurt people hurt others and that is exactly what I did. The irony is, I ended up hurting myself all over again.

So, how can one who looks normal, be so deceitful? I guess it’s true, you can’t judge a book by its cover. Which reverts me to my initial question. Why are we shocked by peoples’ behaviours?

According to the bible, there is nothing outside of a man that can defile him. Yes it is out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. And that heart is deceitfully wicked.

Now, I spoke in my last post about being fearfully and wonderfully made. So how then,  can one’s heart be wicked?

God instructed Jeremiah to go down to the potter’s house and it was illustrated to him how we can be made again even if we were marred (Jeremiah 18:4).

How then does one become marred? How does one’s heart become wicked? It is because of ‘the fall’. We were all born in sin and shaped in iniquity. No one teaches children to steal nor to lie, they just do.

Without Jesus, we are all slaves to sin. Our environment also serves as strong holds, and every negative seed brought in by the enemy through friends, family, culture etc can be watered into fruition. Hence why the bible instructs us to write the words of God on our hearts.

The apostle Paul wrote that the things he doesn’t want to do, he continues to do. He reiterated that it is not he who is doing it, but it is his sinful nature.

Now, I did some horrendous things in the past. And when confronted, I denied and lied because I just could not see myself doing such things. I was a product of my environment and became marred, that was, until I found out what God hoped for when he made me. Then I took all those strongholds in my life and cast them down to the obedience of Christ, hence making the word of God my new stronghold.

The bible instructs us to be holy as he is holy and one can only do so by trading who reigns in your life, and renewing your mind daily. Yes we need to pray without ceasing and put on the full armour of God or we risk falling into the trap of the enemy once again.

I have realised one thing in life. Never say never. You don’t know what seed has been planted on your heart. The only difference between yourself and a perpetrator is timing and getting caught. You do not know what you would do if you were placed in someone else’s situation.

I did not know I would behave like I did when tested. So even if there was no devil, I ask God to protect me from me. Think about it, you would not be the same person if you grew up elsewhere. So stop leaning on to your own understanding. The bible shows that men are cursed when they trust in other humans and themselves. Let’s ask God to direct our paths so that we can be who he hoped for.



A Christian poet

One thought on “Marred…

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