Fearfully and wonderfully made

If you don’t know the value of something, you will abuse it, including your own life. Kings and Queens  carry themselves as royalty, because they know who they are. Likewise, if you are a christian, you should be Christ like and carry yourself like the royal priesthood that you are. However, many of us don’t even know that we are royalty and we look to mere humans for approval. Galatians 1:10 says if seeking people’s approval is your goal, then you would not be a servant of Christ.

God made each and every one of us in his image. Fearfully and wonderfully made. And if you don’t know who you are, people will gladly tell you who you are based on their perception of you. When I was a child, I  hated myself. I thought I was ugly because people said I was. I had the lowest self esteem ever. How tragic for a young girl. When I got older, I used clothes to validate me. I would wear the shortest and tightest to prove to others that I looked good. But little did I know that I was setting my own trap, to be called even worse names than ugly, and guess what, I believed them. So the cycle continued. I hated how I looked and was willing to go under the knife for unnecessary surgery. The low value I placed on myself, made me most susceptible to abuse and so, I allowed people to treat me harshly to the point where I thought I was a nobody. Yes, I was thrown into the bottom of the barrel and left there, and I thought I deserved it all.

In Ezekiel 16, God spoke of his adulterous wife Jerusalem. For the splendour he had given them made their beauty perfect but they chose to prostitute themselves because they still did not know who they were. Are you prostituting yourself because you don’t know your father? Are you giving away a body that is not yours?  Even though God punished the Israelites, he re established an everlasting covenant with them. Isn’t God great?

You have to abort the negative seeds that people try to plant in your life. Don’t give them attention or they will come into fruition. Instead, make the word of God your stronghold. Don’t get high off the accolades of others, people change their minds but God always keeps his promises. And even though you were marred, and you were not what he hoped for, he can make you again, another.

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A sacrificial life

Lately, I’ve been so drained, tired and at times very disorientated. I am not one to complain, I tend to just carry on, enduring like a good soldier, until I just can’t anymore. I have been asking God to help me with my job situation. It is really taking a toll on me physically. Mentally, I’ve cast all my cares on God, but I’m depleting physically and if I don’t get it under control, it will soon manifest spiritually and mentally.

I always say this, if you don’t like something, then change it. But what do you do when you cannot change it? And I think that is where my frustration lies. I cannot change my situation right now due to personal issues. So my weapon is prayer. Whilst walking through the park, I asked God why am I in such a job with no personal gains? I am basically sacrificing myself for the benefit of my patients. He showed me this, “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters” – Colossians 3:22-24. Ah, yes Lord!

Now this spoke volumes to me as it reminded me of the sacrificial life as a Christian. To be Christ like and selfless. No more me, me, me, like infants, but him, him, him, Jesus. It’s the circumcision of the flesh, the burning away of fleshy desires, all to serve him. We must suffer with him to reign with him. Yes, it is hard to give up all your pre- existing knowledge, to put on the mind of Christ. 

But why this sacrificial life? Because before we were born, God knew us, and sanctified us. He said his plans for us are good, to give us an expected end. For eyes have not seen, nor have ears heard nor have entered the hearts of men the things God has in store for those who love him.

So questions to myself are; don’t I want an expected end? Doesn’t God see that I am weary? And isn’t he faithful to build me up and even remove me from an unhealthy situation? Won’t it be better to set my eyes on the higher things, because my current circumstances are temporary? Yes, this sacrificial life is all worth it, I’m awaiting an expected end.